Déjà vu

"Dreams are perceived differently by diverse classes of people. For some, they radiate positive vibes about the future, whereas for some others they may not be as pleasant. But for us, Dream is a topic of research. We see them as the key to the future. And soon, you will too." There were some puzzled faces in the audience, one lady raised her hand and asked, "How can dreams give us clues about the future?" He answered: "We generally remember only 15% of the information of what happens in our dreams, the rest 85% enters a void for us. We believe this vanished memory can be extracted by norepinephrine hormone! But the surprising part is, these incidents which we remember vaguely seem to happen in our lives in near future and then it reminds us of the same dream. Based on this hypothesis we believe that dreams give us hints about the future and our research is based on this phenomenon, popularly known as déjà vu". A huge round of applause concluded my father's speech. Being the chief scientist of this project I cheered with the crowd but my eyes searched for Sitara, perhaps the only girl in my life with the capability of shifting my attention when I am listening to a neuroscience lecture.

                        It was 3 AM in the morning. I was sitting near the poolside when I heard a voice come from the back "Why don't you go tell her?" It was my father. "Some things in life shouldn't be delayed Arjun. You both are regarded as the most talented scientists among all of us. You both would make a great pair." I smiled. "My proposal shouldn't be a reason for her to love me.” I said,” She should love me unconditionally and once I feel that I wouldn't delay it further." He patted my back and left.

                The next morning Sitara and I were getting ready for the experiment. We were both sedated and allowed to dream in a free space. After a 12 hour interval, we both woke up. It felt like I woke up from a reality which I always dreamed of. I couldn't recollect most of what happened. During the analysis, I said "I could only remember my Ferrari Spider, Sitara, tears, rain and Sacramento Airport from the dream. It gave me a pleasant feeling which I am unable to explain in words." After I stepped out she went inside the room, she said "The dream was filled with melancholy, it felt like I lost something very valuable. I can only recollect Arjun, a car, coast highway and the airport of Sacramento " After both the analyses were completed, she came close to me, she was about to tell me something but my father, who is the senior scientist interfered "The events which appeared in your dreams must be kept confidential. You shouldn't discuss it with each other. As both of your dreams are related to each other, we can proceed with our research by trying to understand whether dreams give us clues about the future. So, we suggest that you go on a road trip along the Pacific coast highway. Keep your minds relaxed and enjoy your trip”

                               Our journey began from Dana Point. With the hills peaking down the shore she slipped into the car beside me, dressed in pastel white. I honked, as if trying to wake myself from a dream. She did not talk for a while. Wanting to break the silence I took the first step.

“You look beautiful today”

I paused.

"Thank you, bro!" pat came the reply.

I felt awkward. Wanting to hide myself from that moment, I quickly focused my attention towards the steering wheel. The road seemed longer all of a sudden.

                   Regret splashed on her face as she turned towards the side-view mirror. Maybe it was unintentional on her part. A quick few minutes later, we were able to resume a normal conversation. Time gushed like the wind as we drove. We were following the protocol of not discussing information regarding our dreams, but it felt wonderful to talk. We halted at an inn that night. Under the moonlight, she approached me rather tenderly, "Whom do you love the most in this universe?"

 I didn’t have to think for long "My mother. Though she didn't spend much time with me, I am in this position because of her.  She wanted to see me as a neuroscientist." Tears rolled down my eyes as I walked down the memory lane. Before I could realise myself brimming with emotions, the same dream struck me like a flash for a second. I wanted to tell her about what I had just seen but she had dozed off by then.

                                   The next morning we resumed our journey. The wind tenderly blew her hair as she brushed a few wild strands from over her ear. With the rising sun kissing our faces, we silently cruised down the blue road to Sacramento. This was perhaps the most exhilarating moment of my life. I sighed "I wish that our life could be like this journey. Exciting, joyful and loving each other to the fullest." As soon as I told this, she was lost in a deep thought. I guess she had a déjà vu. I didn't talk for a while because the research was more important. After a short pause, she replied with a sad voice "No! Our life cannot be the way you are thinking. I was hit by my dream again, it gave me a sense of despondency once you expressed your feelings."

I accelerated. “No” echoed in my head in spite of the engine noise. Her voice cut through my ears "Stop!”. At once I applied the brakes, the car drifted and the water on the road plunged on the windshield.

               She explained, "Arjun I can understand your feelings but I had a clear view of my dream, we cannot stay happy in the future." I replied her "So, you had a gloomy phase in your dream, unlike me". Trying to hide her tears she said" Yes! I could relate this incident with my dream. We need to respect our research Arjun." I felt like I was thrown away from this world. I never felt so dejected after my mother's death.

                              It was dawn and we reached the Sacramento Airport. I was taking a flight to San Francisco and she was flying to LA. I went to the ticket counter with a tired and dejected voice and asked:" I want a flight ticket to San Francisco." The air hostess asked, "At what time Sir?" There was a Longines clock at the Airport and the time was 6 PM in it. I looked at the clock and told "Today 9 PM." For a second my mind went blank, I repeated the words in my mind what I just spoke and I ran for her.

                            I went close to Sitara and said "We aren't in the future Sitara. We both are now at this Airport at 6:05 PM and this moment is completely in our hands. No one can change it. It is us who need to make a choice. The dream which you spoke about is already happening, neither I nor you are happy and we both are parting our ways. Our future should never guide our present. After all this time, do you love me Sitara?" She turned to the other side unable to control her tears. A photo slid down her diary. It is the photo of us both on our first day in the neuro lab. She came running to me and hugged me tightly. I could sense the smile on her face while we hugged each other.

                          We both were walking back from the airport, going to my home. It started raining, we both were hit by the same dream again and we looked at each other and smiled. She whispered in my ears "Our Dream came true Arjun".

Tomorrow shouldn't stop you from loving today....

The Breakup...

I was standing out of the publisher's office with a pen in my pocket which was gifted by my father, an empty book which wasn't filled with my thoughts and a deadline of 24 hours to complete the story. I sat in the coffee shop opposite to the office and was thinking about a story which was haunting in my dream for the past three days. But due to my laconic way of writing, I was not able to express the complete emotion which I was feeling. I went back to my apartment with no hope left of completing the story. As I was trying to organise my things in the room I found an old diary. It was a series of someone's life events. As I was turning the pages the title named as "The Breakup" caught my attention. I started reading this unknown person's breakup story.

                                                   "I was standing at an altitude of 300ft above the sea level to capture one of the most vibrant and rarest moment, the triple sunrise. After successive failures, that day I got my desired shot. As I got back I received a phone call, It was my friend. He told me that all the college friends are going on a reunion tour. So, he asked me also to join the tour. I asked him with a brisk voice whether she was also coming? As soon as I heard a "Yes!" I could sense some kind of nostalgia in me. More than the tour I was excited to see her. I was waiting for the bus, and as soon as I got on the bus all my old friends were greeting me, but my attention was somewhere else. I could see that only one seat was vacant. I realised that I sat next to her after looking at the bag which I gifted her. I made a noise with my boots to indicate that I was sitting next to her. She looked at me as if a stranger was sitting next to her. I told "Destiny! that we are meeting again and I had to sit next to you." in an annoying way. She went to sleep and didn't listen to me. As I looked at her face I remembered the days at college.
               It was exactly 7 years back I first saw her. She used to sit in the adjacent class as she was a fine arts student. Eventually, I gained interest in photography than cryptography. We both became good friends but I was a bit hesitant to tell her. In our college, we used to have a programme named as "Express" where some people used to tell their untold stories. It was my chance that day, I was a bit hesitant to speak out. I could see her in the crowd. I couldn't speak out and I left that place abruptly. As I was walking back I heard her voice saying "I love you Surya". From then life became exciting and cheerful.
                     I woke up as my head hit the front seat due to a sudden break. We have reached our destination. She wasn't talking to me, not even looking at me. I was sitting all alone under the moonlight, thinking about our farewell day. I was supposed to be in the college but I was sitting all alone with a flight ticket and a ringing phone in front of me. She was calling me as I promised her that I would come. I couldn't leave her but I can't stop in my career. I was not able to understand if this was love. Apprehension about the future, despondent on leaving her, in such confusion, I checked in my flight and switched off my phone. My phone sound woke me up from that deep thought. She texted me saying "In tomorrow's reunion party tell everyone that we are no longer together. Don't run away this time". I was annoyed after looking at that message. The next morning I was getting ready to for the 'Express meet'.
                        As I went to the place, I looked at her, she was looking gorgeous in the blue sari. It was my chance again, the same fear within me, but this time I spoke. " Seven years ago I was reticent about telling her that I loved her. Today I am here brave enough to tell you about an untold character 'Surya'. The truth is that we both are no more together. Surya left her on the farewell day and went to pursue his career. He was obscure about this concept of love. But since he went to Europe he was missing something in life, a person with whom he could share his happiness, a caring hand which supported him in his difficult times, a smile which could heal his deepest sorrow, a heart which loved him truthfully. Unknowingly the obscure feeling of love was becoming clear and it appeared to him as a portrait of her. But his watch was too slow, as it is too late that he realised the true love he had for her. So they both were not together all these days". As I finished speaking I could see everyone in tears, I walked up to her and said "This is Surya signing off!!" and walked away from that place as I couldn't control my tears."
                           After this the pages were blank. I felt as if I woke up from a beautiful dream abruptly. At the back of the book, I saw a name 'Surya Vasudevan' printed on the cover. After a long sleepless night, the next morning I went to the publisher office for submitting the story "The Breakup". After the editor read the story he appeared to be a bit puzzled. He then asked me "What happened in the end?" I replied to him saying "He heard the same voice which he heard 7 years ago, She came running to him and whispered in his ear, "It is not the destiny, It is the word called 'Love' which we both stood on made us come together once again." The editor smiled and told me that he loved the story. He asked me "How could you tell the ending of a person's real life story?". I replied to him "This is because my name is Adi Vasudevan son of Surya Vasudevan." 

ghost

It was on a pleasant evening when the heat of the day got replaced by a cool breeze. I was standing on the terrace of my office and was enjoying the beauty of the weather. I could hear the voice of the nature. There was radio running in the background and I slowly lost myself in thought, I was just trying to understand the incompleteness in my life in spite of having everything. Slightly different from the sound of the breeze I could hear my phone ringing. It was a reminder that I had to go out for  dinner with Naina, one of my good friends. I reached the place an hour early. I was sitting in the restaurant waiting for her. There was something weird about the place. I was not feeling comfortable. I could sense something behind me but when I turned back there was nothing. Naina came at last after I had waited for about an hour. We talked for some time. I was still feeling weird as I could sense someone standing behind me. She then expressed her feelings towards me and she told that she loved me. Her unexpected confession made my thoughts drift towards my past. I wanted to accept her proposal but, I could hear a voice "Tell her that you don't love her". I couldn't go against that voice, It seemed to be really powerful. I just couldn't stay in that place anymore, so I told Naina I would meet her the next day and I left the place immediately.
I went back home and I received a message from Siri, my first love. She was in the town for some work and asked me if I was free the next day to spend an evening with her. I replied to her saying that I would come and we decided to go for the concert which is happening in the town. I never admitted my feelings for her. My voice used to go blank whenever I tried to tell her about this. There used to be a strong force which would counter me. I went to bed early. I woke up at 2 AM in the morning abruptly. It was eerily quite except for a distinct sound that seemed to be coming from the living room. I tiptoed there to find the source for that sound and I could see a person sitting on the sofa playing with my rubiks cube. I switched on the lights to see if this is real, and to my surprise it was real.  I couldn't believe my eyes as I saw him because he looked like me. I gathered all of my shattered courage and asked him "Who are you?". He smiled and told "I am a ghost!" My face completely turned red and for a second I held my breath. Then he slowly came approaching towards me and said "Don't worry I am not what you are thinking let us sit and talk." My heartbeat went to normal but I could not understand what was happening. I asked him the reason why we looked alike, then he replied that we look alike because we both refer to the same person. I was quite puzzled by his statement and my legs started shivering. Then he slowly told "I am the same person who you were five years down the lane". I looked at the clock and it was ticking which confirmed that everything that I was witnessing was real. He started discussing about my life. He asked me "Why are you lying to Siri? Why didn't you tell her that you love her?" I told him I didn't love her anymore. He smiled at me, patted my back and said " You have reached a stage of your life where you started lying to yourself." Tears rolled down my cheeks as I contemplated his statement. He consoled me and asked to express the deepest feeling in my heart. I admitted that I really loved her and I could never forget her all these days. But, I always had a fear to admit to her. He said "I never had this fear where did this fear come from?" I was about to tell him about some incidents then he cut me abruptly saying "I have come here to make you realize that you are courageous and you had faced things in your life with utmost courage, there may be certain incidents which made you feel low but don't forget that you were courageous and the evidence lies right in front of you. I am there to support you, all you need to do is just realize that you are never a coward." His words gave me a deep insight about me as I could see myself as a courageous person. We both went on talking for a long time. In the end I asked him "If you were the same person as me then by me being alive, how did you turn into a ghost?" He said "This is because you killed me 5 years back and since then you began to grow as a different person altogether. So I turned to be a ghost." His answer to my question left me in a thought all through the night. I could see myself how innocent and kindhearted I was!
                                              Next morning I was preparing to go to the concert where I planned to meet Siri. He came with me as I went to her. I went to the concert place but I couldn't find her. Then I could see her seated inside the concert hall waiting for me. "You always had a wish of singing a song  for her right?" came a voice from him. I looked at him and smiled. Without catching her sight I went to the stage and I requested the concert manger that I would perform. After a long talk he agreed, I was waiting to see her eyes filled with surprise when I would perform. I could see that she was leaving the concert hall to search for me then my name was announced and then she looked back and sat back in her place. That day I sang for her, the song which I always dreamed of singing for her. I could see her eyes were filled with tears of happiness when I told that the song was dedicated for her. I could see him smiling in the corner of the hall. She hugged me tight and slapped me on my face for not telling her all these days. I was searching for him but I couldn't find him. I wanted to share with him first but I couldn't find him. There was a mirror at the entrance when I observed my face in this mirror and when I was looking at my face I could see his glowing smile in my face.

The ghost did not vanish it came back to life and he will be within me forever....

Hero

I was sitting in the corner of the room sipping coffee from my favourite coffee mug and was enjoying the pleasant moonlight from the window. An old diary had caught my attention and I began reading it. As I started reading it I began to feel nostalgic. Then I saw my little girl coming into the room and I hid the diary from her. She was looking a bit gloomy than usual. She said that she wasn't feeling sleepy and wanted to hear a different story from me than the usual one. I started narrating the story by saying the title which is 'Hero'. She got really interested in the title.
                                                                "Long ago there lived a boy who aspired to be a hero. Not a reel hero but a real hero for his life. He wanted to be a hero for every person around him. He had no other passion. This passion turned into madness and he used to watch a lot of reel heroes and admire their ideology and mannerisms. He easily got attracted to people who were courageous and heroic. In this way, our hero started his journey. But the people around him were not very kind enough. They made fun of him, they said that he was worthless. But he was really strong and he didn't give up on his dream. But the society turned to be a parasite for his dream and the force was really strong that the boy got demoralised. The dynamic and energetic boy became silent and very calm. He got disheartened and lived in his own world lost in his own thoughts. He made pen as his dearest friend and began to ink his thoughts in his diary. Every day in his life seemed the same. He used to sit near the lakeside all alone every day after his college time. He spent most of his time reading books and writing.
              One fine day there came a new girl to his college. She looked like an angel. He couldn't believe his eyes after looking at her. He could feel some unknown happiness in him when he looked at her eyes. He was afraid to talk to her because of the bad past he had. One fine day the boy saw her approaching him. He began to tremble, she came up to him and started talking to him. His voice was shaky and his heartbeat has gone up but he also started talking to her. He started feeling strange while he was talking to her. It felt like he was experiencing all his lost happiness when he was talking to her. It was the first time he came out of his fear. He started being cheerful. As time passed they both became good friends. He never told about his past to her. One day an article written by him caught her attention. She began reading it and she was amazed after reading the article. She ran to him and asked him why he never told her that he loved writing. He just didn't explain anything to her and walked away. Later that evening she again asked him then he took her to the lakeside and explained her that his life was small, lonely. He explained her about the bad past he had and that is the reason he never loved people around him. She asked him the reason for not completing the book which he started. He told that he could not explain her anymore and asked her to leave him alone. Before she left that place she told him " Hatred is never ended by hatred but by love. And if you ever loved me finish your past".
                She not only left that place but also from his life. He began to lose his charm as she left him. He remembered her words and started writing the book which he started. He often used to remember her how friendly he used to be with her. It took him 3 months to complete the book. He released the book with her name so that she can come back to him. The book became really successful. His college organised a meet to congratulate him. After the release of the book he was known to everyone. Every person who made fun of him were talking great things about him. His classmates were really proud of him. Everyone were congratulating him. There were many people around him. He was really surprised about himself. The atmosphere around him was really noisy. In that noise he heard a voice, a known voice shouting aloud "Hero!!". He turned back and it was her. He always had a wish that his loved ones calling him "Hero" aloud. He ran to her and hugged her tight and whispered in her ears" How did you know about my deepest wish?". She showed him his personal diary in which he wrote about his aspiration." The little girl was really amazed after she listened to the story. She asked," Who is the girl in the story dad?". Then I told her it was her mother. She missed her mother a lot and she just went to bed without saying a word. I could sense her sadness.
                                                                    After she slept I found the old diary which I hid from the little girl. As I picked the diary I found one of her pictures. After seeing that picture I couldn't stop my tears. I remembered those days when we loved each other. The one thing which I can never tell my daughter is that I am not her father...

His first love called him hero for which he became the hero for her daughter's life